I’ve been asking myself the same question quite a bit lately……is this place good for me? I’m not talking about my job for once (oh yeah….I really don’t talk about it much, do I?), but rather I’m talking about the area of our country in where I live. I guess I’ve been too spoiled in the last 6 years over living in larger cities where there is an abundance of things to do. People asked me when I was in Denver or in Orange County “What do people DO up there in Montana?”, and you know…the only honest answer I can give them is “Most of the time, I don’t have one freaking clue!”.
I mean really! LOOK at this state on Google Maps or Google Earth. WHAT is it that is so great about here? You could take the total population of this entire state and fit it neatly into the metro Denver proper area (not counting the suburbs)! That is SMALL! Yeah, it’s great if you like lots of wide, open spaces and the smell of *gag!* manure every 10 miles from the unending stretch of farmland as far as the eye can see around here…..and I’m in the biggest spot on the map! I guess I should be grateful for a few things, like the fact that it’s a lot cheaper to live here, there is no sales tax, and I found a job (there I go again!) that pays pretty well!
BUT….what about OTHER than the good work and cheap rent? What else is there? I’m still trying to find it, to tell you the truth. I have grown to love my alternative lifestyle so much that I’m finding it stifling to be around here. There seems to be no freedom of self-expression, and everyone else is so straight-laced, that if you pulled any more, it would snap in two! I guess that’s why people get so bitter when their cable TV and internet don’t work…..there is nothing else to do! I’m sorry, but I’m not one for going western line dancing, I don’t drink but very rarely, I don’t hunt, and I don’t fish (since my dad passed away, bless his soul), so I guess I’d better get back to riding my bike, so that way I don’t tub out beyond belief and end up with health problems on top of my intermittent depression. I stepped on a health-scale back in the 80’s in a mall, and was told that for my height and body mass, my ideal weight is about 185. Well, I’m not quite double that, but getting WAY too close for my own comfort zone, and that bothers me as well, along with needing to get some dental work done that has been put off far too long (mainly due to crappy jobs with little to no insurance), so I think once I get those under control, I might feel a bit better.
I know….you’re thinking I’m just a mopey, bitter person, right? Well, actually I’m not. I pride myself in being my own person, and I’m not looking for anyone’s approval. I stopped caring what other people thought of my lifestyle back in the 80’s, and aside from having to conform just a little bit in my work environment (GAH! There I go again), then I pretty much live as I wish. I love my family life, and wouldn’t trade it for anything, but I just wish there were more things I could show them out there. I guess I just need to get my ass in gear and get some certifications under my belt so I can be a bit more marketable, and then I can do more things! California spoiled me for sure because of all the visits to Disneyland, the ocean, and other nice places, plus the fact that I think I wore little more than a T-shirt a majority of the time – I loved it! Someday I hope to go back there……..or at least back to Denver. That would be nice. I have nothing against those who choose to live in Montana, but I don’t think this is where my journey will end by any means.